On finishing No More Than This

I spent nearly a year making my graduation film—started the script in July and worked on it through the summer, pitched in October, got crew, started preproduction, started crowdfunding in December, shot the film for 6 days in February, and spent several months fixing the problems and finding coherence and meaning out of the mess that it was. 
Last year I called Footfalls the most difficult shoot I ever had. It no longer is. No More Than This (formerly known as Non-Person) was a tortured production—full of mistakes and mishaps and perhaps just plain bad luck. I didn’t talk about it, because it was difficult to talk about without some resentment. I also had lots of guilt, and self-doubt. It is not perfect, in fact it’s not even the film I wanted to make. Looking back, there are a million things I would have done differently. 
Nevertheless, I have decided to embrace the film. I have taken risks, and worked very hard, and even though I did make mistakes, there were many moments that I did the best anyone could, under the circumstance. But above all, it’s a story I wanted to tell. It is mine, it is so far my best and most important work. Considering all the things that were against me, and all the trouble we had to deal with, I’m proud of the finished film, and don’t think the audience can really tell what was happening on and off set. 
This year I have learnt a lot, about filmmaking, about directing, about people, and about myself. When you have worked on a film, especially if many things go wrong, you see things differently—people may ask why you didn’t do something, but only you (and perhaps your crew) understand the reasoning behind your decisions, and only you know that sometimes that’s the only option you’ve got. But at the same time you also know that it doesn’t matter—the shoot doesn’t matter, your problems don’t matter, your headaches and heartaches don’t matter, the audience only know what is on the screen, and your job is to focus on it and do the best you can, and figure out what to do when something doesn’t go as planned. You cannot go around and try to justify the things that don’t work in the film, because no one cares, so the only thing you can do is to deliver the best work you can possibly deliver and leave the rest to the audience. 
That’s all I want to say. I’ve got through it all and completed the film. Here’s to the future!



PS: My film Footfalls has just been officially selected for Manchester Student Film Festival. 
Come to the screening on 6/6 if you are around.