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Wednesday, 12 September 2012

My punishment, my vow

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You ask me why I am silent. You guess all I need is a rest and when it's over everything will be alright again. But that's not true. Perhaps at some point I will break this silence- who ever knows the future?- but somehow I've decided to remain silent, even if it somehow seems like a betrayal, or contradiction, of what I earlier stated. 
On the surface I suppose it looks like I simply have other focuses, other priorities, and my staying away is temporary, or results from disillusionment and self-disappointment associated with extremely high expectations but will soon be overcome. Yet, this silence is a punishment. 1st, for people who don't use the little power they have and, harsh as it sounds, totally deserve what they're facing (and, because of it, I don't want to have anything to do with them). 2nd, for myself, for now in disillusionment, starting to see several things I didn't at the time, I feel so strongly disgusted with a few false things from my mouth that I now no longer deserve a voice, and should remain silent. 
But you don't care, do you? Nobody does. 
I'm a speck of dust. 
That is all.