Wednesday, 28 March 2012

Having gone through hell

1 positive side of bullying is that once you've gone through it, it becomes a vaccine. You might not necessarily become stronger. You might not become deep, thoughtful or successful- it doesn't guarantee anything. And the scars are still there, always there. Your experience of being bullied shapes your personality, has some impacts on your perception of life and human beings, your self-esteem, your confidence, your ability to trust, ability to connect, etc. The scars are always there. After a while you no longer feel the pain, and can't remember the exact feelings you had, but it shaped your personality and perception of life whilst you were enduring it. When I say the positive side of bullying, I don't mean to say I advocate bullying, but merely write down these lines from the point of view of someone who has been bullied. When it happens, it's tough, I know. There are times when people aren't strong enough to cope with it. They fail, they collapse, they destroy themselves. Some people can endure it a bit longer, and once it's over, they're vaccinated. Some, weak and fragile, unfortunately, can't. But you know what, you just have to wait. Things get better. And once you've gone through it, when something bad happens to you, saddens you, upsets you, disappoints you, depresses you, you stay alive, by thinking of that period of time when you hated life and yourself and everyone else and saw no meaning with life but you went through it and survived nevertheless, and whatever that upsets you now is nothing compared to what happened, and you stay alive. Things change. Change is the only constant. We don't know what happens after death. So just stay alive. Things might not turn out wonderful and fabulous the way you hope, things might not necessarily get better, sometimes, but things change. That's good enough. 

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